I am Black and Gay

I used to be a shop steward until they kicked me out for being in the BNP.

Before they kicked me out I attended a union meeting on race and racial issues in the workplace.

In that meeting they explained to me that race did not exist and that we are what race we think we are.

I said 'does that mean I can be white in the morning and black in the afternoon if I want ?'

She actually said yes.

So I have a new plan.

David Cameron, or Tony Blair Mark 2 as he is known, is going to allow blacks to claim free money if they want to set up their own business.

So I have decided that if you cant beat them, join them.

Whenever I fill in any form from now on I am going to classify myself as Black and Gay.

This has a double effect - first of it raises the numbers of blacks who in the country thereby reflecting the reality of their numbers instead of the deliberate underplaying of the numbers of Blacks in the country and it means you can sue for discrimination if anyone ever gives you any shit.

The more people classify themselves as Black the more that whites are regarded as a minority.

That means whites then get the benefit of being minorities, except of course if they adopt the South African model of political correctness where the BLACK ETHNIC MAJORITY get all the rights and the white ethnic minority get nothing.

It appears that political correctness is nothing more than a mechanism for the removal of the social rights, wealth and opportunities for whites whether they are a minority or a majority - but hey, dumb as fuck middle class moronic whites vote for the Labour and Tory Party, and Democrats and Republicans, and for the ANC so fuck them, they deserve all they get the morons.

But I will be okay as I am now Black and Gay.

They cant tell me that I am not black as that is racist.

As race doesnt exist, then to deny me the right to define myself as black in a non-racial way is itself racially discriminatory.

I may not have a black skin, but you dont have to have a black skin to be black.


Black is what and who you think you are.

Black is not a racial thing, as races dont exist as they tell us all the time, and therefore black is whoever thinks they are black.

And I am now black.

Not in a racial sense, but in a non-racial sense.

My ancestors were once black and came from Africa about 100,000 years ago they tell me all the time on TV, in the papers and also at school, so I can legitimately call myself black if I want.

They cant tell me I am not gay either - even though I have never sodomised another male, nor indulged in any sexual contact with a male ever - I am now gay, though not in a sexual way.

I am a sort of 'non-practising gay' who is in a heterosexual relationship.

I am in fact a 'gay man who because of societies evil homophobia I have to hide my gayness behind a veneer of heterosexuality and only have heterosexual relationships' type of gay.

I am still gay and black though, but not in a sexual or racial way.

Do you get my drift here ?

See where this is going ?

Because thats what I am going to put on all the forms in future when they ask me and if anyone disagrees with me - then I am going to sue the arse off them for racial and sexual discrimination.

Kerching.

Kerching.


If you cant beat them, join them.


So then lets all fill those forms in to take advantage of affirmative action.

They cant call you a liar, and if they try and tell you that you are not who you say you are, then you can sue them for loads of cash.

So dont forget, lets fill those forms in properly in future.

Now where I did put my Boney M and Imagination records ? Hmmmm.